Some of my fellow Nomad interns from South Africa will be heading back to S.A. sometime early in 2012. They happen to be from the same town back in the States, even though they didn't really know each other before they met in Africa. Some of my other intern friends from S.A. have recently gotten married and are also heading back to the mission field. We're all in the same boat, preparing to go on a new adventure and anxiously awaiting what's next!... However, I can't help but wish that I had someone who was going with me to Wales, like my friends do. Just someone who I could talk to and be excited with. I feel like life's experiences are more fulfilling when they are shared with someone else. I won't be totally alone in Wales. I know the missionaries I'll be working with and I'm excited to be with them, but it's not the same because I'm only there for a short time and when I come back there's no one here who I can really relate to about my time in Wales.
Just a few days ago I heard this song, Not Alone, by Red. It was incredibly encouraging to me! To be honest, I felt like Jesus was singing this just to me.
I am with you
I will carry you through it all.
I won't leave you
I will catch you
When you feel like letting go.
'Cause you're not,
you're not alone.
I really can't explain it, but Jesus felt so close to me the other night when I was laying in bed listening to this song over and over! I feel comforted and more prepared to face what's next!
I am with you!
May we always remember this. Jesus is literally always with you!
I hope this encourages you as much as it did me.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Thursday, December 29, 2011
The Spotlight
I hate being in the spotlight. It's weird because I don't mind being the center of attention in some situations, but if there is some party or event or anything like that and it's focused on me, I don't like it. The unfortunate thing with being a missionary is that in some ways you are forced to be in the spotlight. More so than being in the spotlight or on stage,I don't like feeling like I'm bragging when I talk about what I'm doing with my life. "Look at me, I'm going overseas to be a missionary." That's not my heart at all, but I can't help but feel like that's how others may be perceiving me at times.
This past year I've met new people and run into old friends, and of course the question is always asked, "What are you doing now?" My reply usually goes like this, "Well, I graduated from K-State in December 2009, I spent 2010 in South Africa doing children's ministry with OneHope, this year I'm working at an elementary school as a para with behavior disorder kids, and next year I'm moving to Wales to do church planting." Most people's responses are something like, "Oh, wow!" I cringe on the inside and feel like a jerk. I feel like I'm bragging and trying to seem holier-than-thou.
The truth is God has called all of us to different things. A part of me wants everyone that can be a missionary to be one. I really feel like at least a year of just serving with a missionary in another country has so many benefits, but truthfully not everyone can do that and not everyone is supposed to. Although, I'll always at least suggest it to a college student.
We are all missionaries, but not everyone is called to be a vocational missionary. I feel like God has called me to be a vocational missionary. Why else would He put such a desire in my heart to help people, to travel, and to have a love of photographing new places? But, just because I think God wants me to be a vocational missionary doesn't make me any better than the person he has called to be a stay-at-home mom or a businessman. It's easy to think that a missionary is a better Christian because they are willing to move around, openly talk about Jesus, and have to raise money to live off of, but it's not true at all. We are at our best when we are our true selves. When we do what God wants us to do. In my case that may well be full time missionary work overseas, and for someone else it may be working at grocery store. One is not better than the other. However, if that person called to be a missionary doesn't do so because they are scared, they aren't being Gods best. And if that person who is called to work at a grocery store thinks it's not good enough and instead decides to go overseas because it seems like the good Christian thing to do, they aren't being Gods best either... So how do we know what's Gods best for us? Spend time with Him and you'll know. I know that sounds like a cop-out answer, but really it's what it comes down to. Unless you know someone how are you supposed to know what they want you to do?
I read this article today and that's what inspired me to write this post. We need Christians everywhere. Overseas as missionaries and in the everyday mundane. I like that the author makes the point of how a missionaries life isn't always as exciting as it's made out to be. Truthfully, when I was in Africa I spent a lot of time cleaning, cooking, doing behind the scenes work, and even writing soccer clinic curriculum (never saw that one coming!) It wasn't all glory and adventure. Yes, I did live on a game farm, which was an adventure in itself, and I did get to go to Victoria Falls and Cape Town, but those were just a few days out of the 10 months I was there. A missionaries life can be very exciting at times, but there is a lot of the mundane in it as well.
I guess it really comes down to this, it's not about the adventure. It's about being true to who God wants you to be. Whatever it is. Be true to that and don't try to be something God doesn't want to be; but also, don't afraid to be what God has called you to be!
As long as you are following after God's heart and doing what He asks you to do, that's your best. I never, ever, ever want anyone to think that I'm better than anyone else because I'm a missionary. I'm just trying to find out what God really wants me to do, and be faithful to that. I believe that's what He wants from all of us.
He wants that intimate love relationship, and through that He will make the path you are supposed to take clear. Love first, then comes direction. We must seek HIM, not a 5-yr plan.
When you are in that place of loving Jesus and following His calling on your life it will be an adventure; whether it be sweeping a floor, or writing computer soft-wear, or being a missionary in Africa or in Europe. Loving Jesus is the true adventure, not the job or the location.
This past year I've met new people and run into old friends, and of course the question is always asked, "What are you doing now?" My reply usually goes like this, "Well, I graduated from K-State in December 2009, I spent 2010 in South Africa doing children's ministry with OneHope, this year I'm working at an elementary school as a para with behavior disorder kids, and next year I'm moving to Wales to do church planting." Most people's responses are something like, "Oh, wow!" I cringe on the inside and feel like a jerk. I feel like I'm bragging and trying to seem holier-than-thou.
The truth is God has called all of us to different things. A part of me wants everyone that can be a missionary to be one. I really feel like at least a year of just serving with a missionary in another country has so many benefits, but truthfully not everyone can do that and not everyone is supposed to. Although, I'll always at least suggest it to a college student.
We are all missionaries, but not everyone is called to be a vocational missionary. I feel like God has called me to be a vocational missionary. Why else would He put such a desire in my heart to help people, to travel, and to have a love of photographing new places? But, just because I think God wants me to be a vocational missionary doesn't make me any better than the person he has called to be a stay-at-home mom or a businessman. It's easy to think that a missionary is a better Christian because they are willing to move around, openly talk about Jesus, and have to raise money to live off of, but it's not true at all. We are at our best when we are our true selves. When we do what God wants us to do. In my case that may well be full time missionary work overseas, and for someone else it may be working at grocery store. One is not better than the other. However, if that person called to be a missionary doesn't do so because they are scared, they aren't being Gods best. And if that person who is called to work at a grocery store thinks it's not good enough and instead decides to go overseas because it seems like the good Christian thing to do, they aren't being Gods best either... So how do we know what's Gods best for us? Spend time with Him and you'll know. I know that sounds like a cop-out answer, but really it's what it comes down to. Unless you know someone how are you supposed to know what they want you to do?
I read this article today and that's what inspired me to write this post. We need Christians everywhere. Overseas as missionaries and in the everyday mundane. I like that the author makes the point of how a missionaries life isn't always as exciting as it's made out to be. Truthfully, when I was in Africa I spent a lot of time cleaning, cooking, doing behind the scenes work, and even writing soccer clinic curriculum (never saw that one coming!) It wasn't all glory and adventure. Yes, I did live on a game farm, which was an adventure in itself, and I did get to go to Victoria Falls and Cape Town, but those were just a few days out of the 10 months I was there. A missionaries life can be very exciting at times, but there is a lot of the mundane in it as well.
I guess it really comes down to this, it's not about the adventure. It's about being true to who God wants you to be. Whatever it is. Be true to that and don't try to be something God doesn't want to be; but also, don't afraid to be what God has called you to be!
As long as you are following after God's heart and doing what He asks you to do, that's your best. I never, ever, ever want anyone to think that I'm better than anyone else because I'm a missionary. I'm just trying to find out what God really wants me to do, and be faithful to that. I believe that's what He wants from all of us.
He wants that intimate love relationship, and through that He will make the path you are supposed to take clear. Love first, then comes direction. We must seek HIM, not a 5-yr plan.
When you are in that place of loving Jesus and following His calling on your life it will be an adventure; whether it be sweeping a floor, or writing computer soft-wear, or being a missionary in Africa or in Europe. Loving Jesus is the true adventure, not the job or the location.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
You Said
Has God ever used a song or something else over and over again in your life to show you something? I love it when He does that. It gives you confirmation that He is there and really does know you! He knows that thing that will speak to your heart.
There's a song by Shane and Shane called You Said that God has used to speak to me several times.
The first time I heard this song was a few week after I had gone to The World Missions Summit over Christmas break 2008. It was at TWMS that I decided to give a year to missions. I believe it was the first Sunday after the conference and I was at my home church in Fort Scott. During worship they played this song and part of the chorus goes like this, "Ask and I'll give the nations to you, oh Lord that's the cry of my heart. Distant shores and the islands will see Your light as it rises on us." When I heard that it hit me! That really had become the cry of my heart and God was confirming that. After the song my pastor asked that anyone who had that burden on their heart would stand up because he wanted to pray for them. Now I'm generally shy about standing up in church or going up for prayer, but I knew that I needed to this time. It was a final commitment to giving that year.
A year later I was back at my home church, and this was my last day at home before I left for South Africa. I was nervous and anxious about going. During worship they sang You Said again. It was such a comfort and reassurance of what God had been telling me to do.
After I had been in South Africa for a few months we went to a bigger city, Polokwane, to get out of the bush and go to church. I believe it was in march. The service was nice, a bit more like home which was a comfort after being gone for a while. There was an elderly lady there named Carol who was from the States and had worked with this church for decades. That Sunday they had her go up and share what she had been doing all these years. It turns out she was from Kansas! I couldn't believe it. On the other side of the planet and I find someone else from my home state. She had made a slide show, but when they started it there was no music. So she made them stop it and get it fixed so it would play with the music... Guess what song it was? You Said! I was blown away by God giving me that song again! It was awesome. I knew He had worked all that out just for me.
Just a few weeks ago I was back in Fort Scott for Thanksgiving. Like I said in my previous post, I've had a lot of spiritual attack with regards to going to Wales. I needed encouragement, I needed a touch from Jesus. I got it. During the offering time the worship leader did a solo, You Said. Every time I hear that song it brings warmth to my heart. I know Jesus is right there with me. Not only that, but it brings back the passion I so quickly loose about reaching the lost. So many don't get to see the Light rising on us. We need to go the those distant shores and islands so those in darkness can see the Light!... The sermon that Sunday was over Psalms 91 and it encouraged me so much. It gave me a peace.
Ask and I'll give the nations to you, Oh Lord that's the cry of my heart.
Distant shores and the islands will see Your light as it rises on us.
God is always speaking to us, to you. In a specific way. He has those special little things He uses just for you, no one else. Take the time to listen to what He's saying...Behind everything He says there will be this, "I love you, I want you! You bring me joy and I am desperate for you! Please come to me."
You Said.
That's just one of the ways God has spoken to me and I wanted to share it with you.
There's a song by Shane and Shane called You Said that God has used to speak to me several times.
The first time I heard this song was a few week after I had gone to The World Missions Summit over Christmas break 2008. It was at TWMS that I decided to give a year to missions. I believe it was the first Sunday after the conference and I was at my home church in Fort Scott. During worship they played this song and part of the chorus goes like this, "Ask and I'll give the nations to you, oh Lord that's the cry of my heart. Distant shores and the islands will see Your light as it rises on us." When I heard that it hit me! That really had become the cry of my heart and God was confirming that. After the song my pastor asked that anyone who had that burden on their heart would stand up because he wanted to pray for them. Now I'm generally shy about standing up in church or going up for prayer, but I knew that I needed to this time. It was a final commitment to giving that year.
A year later I was back at my home church, and this was my last day at home before I left for South Africa. I was nervous and anxious about going. During worship they sang You Said again. It was such a comfort and reassurance of what God had been telling me to do.
After I had been in South Africa for a few months we went to a bigger city, Polokwane, to get out of the bush and go to church. I believe it was in march. The service was nice, a bit more like home which was a comfort after being gone for a while. There was an elderly lady there named Carol who was from the States and had worked with this church for decades. That Sunday they had her go up and share what she had been doing all these years. It turns out she was from Kansas! I couldn't believe it. On the other side of the planet and I find someone else from my home state. She had made a slide show, but when they started it there was no music. So she made them stop it and get it fixed so it would play with the music... Guess what song it was? You Said! I was blown away by God giving me that song again! It was awesome. I knew He had worked all that out just for me.
Just a few weeks ago I was back in Fort Scott for Thanksgiving. Like I said in my previous post, I've had a lot of spiritual attack with regards to going to Wales. I needed encouragement, I needed a touch from Jesus. I got it. During the offering time the worship leader did a solo, You Said. Every time I hear that song it brings warmth to my heart. I know Jesus is right there with me. Not only that, but it brings back the passion I so quickly loose about reaching the lost. So many don't get to see the Light rising on us. We need to go the those distant shores and islands so those in darkness can see the Light!... The sermon that Sunday was over Psalms 91 and it encouraged me so much. It gave me a peace.
Ask and I'll give the nations to you, Oh Lord that's the cry of my heart.
Distant shores and the islands will see Your light as it rises on us.
God is always speaking to us, to you. In a specific way. He has those special little things He uses just for you, no one else. Take the time to listen to what He's saying...Behind everything He says there will be this, "I love you, I want you! You bring me joy and I am desperate for you! Please come to me."
You Said.
That's just one of the ways God has spoken to me and I wanted to share it with you.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Encouragement
The time for my departure is fast approaching!... I still don't have my visa or a flight, but I'm trusting that it will come in quickly and I'll still be able to leave in mid January, just a month away!
I'm very excited, but also very nervous at the same time! To tell you that I have no concerns about next year would be a straight out lie. There's about a thousand different things I could be concerned with, and I'm familiar with the stresses that come along with moving to the other side of the planet. I know I will encounter many awkward and uncomfortable situations, I'm going to be pushed to edge of my comfort zone for sure! Not only that, but I'm leaving behind all of my family and friends. Granted, there are the wonders of the internet, and I'm sure I'll get my use out of Skype next year. But, with all the available technology, you can't replace time spent in the presence of your family and friends. Simply enjoying the company of those you are around.... With all this said, I'm fairly certain that I've also been under a lot of spiritual attack lately. As soon as I go to bed I'm plagued with doubts as to whether or not I'm doing the right thing, or if I'm in any way capable of doing it. I think of the reasons why I shouldn't be going. and all the things I'm not good at and really can't do. To be totally honest, a lot of times the thought, "What the hell am I doing?!" runs through my head.
I truly believe all of this is spiritual warfare. Just this morning as I was walking out the door to go to church, my last Sunday in Manhattan before I leave, the thought "Why am I doing this?" ran through my head. I did my best to push it aside and then headed off to church. As I walked into the sanctuary I said hello to one of the lady's I know, she smiled back and kept walking. Then she stopped and came back to me. She gave me a hug and told me she wanted to say goodbye before I left. Next she said something else, something that cut right to my heart. She said, "You know Paul, right from when I very first met you I knew God had this call on your life. It's a hard call, but thank you. Amen" It's like God was speaking directly to me, it took me a few minutes to think about it and realize how blatantly God was confirming this in my life! I sat down next to some of my friends, and then one of the high-school boys come up to me and gave me a bag of chocolate covered peanuts. He said, "I just want you to know that we are praying for you and what you're doing is awesome. Merry Christmas." Again, a direct confirmation that I'm doing what God has for me. The interesting thing is that I'm not close friends with either of the people who talked to me today, which I think confirms it even more that it was God talking right to me. It was so encouraging! It lifted my spirit.
Next year will be hard, there's no doubt about that, but I also know it will be an incredible adventure. Every time I've stepped out on a limb when I felt God calling me to do something it's been very hard and very rewarding. South Africa was an adventure to say the least, and I'm guessing Europe will be as well. God doesn't change, so the way He treats His children won't change either. I've seen Him faithful through and through, so I know He will continue to be there for me!.. I'm sad to be leaving my family and friends behind, but I know that I have a new family and new friends waiting for me in Wales. Every time I've moved someplace new God's provided that for me, and I still have meaningful relationships with people from those places.
Today I was encouraged. Today God spoke right to my heart and gave me the confirmation I needed.
The next couple of days will be bittersweet. I'm excited to be moving on, but I will miss everyone here in Manhattan so much!
It's a new chapter in the journey, and I can't wait to see what happens!
I'm very excited, but also very nervous at the same time! To tell you that I have no concerns about next year would be a straight out lie. There's about a thousand different things I could be concerned with, and I'm familiar with the stresses that come along with moving to the other side of the planet. I know I will encounter many awkward and uncomfortable situations, I'm going to be pushed to edge of my comfort zone for sure! Not only that, but I'm leaving behind all of my family and friends. Granted, there are the wonders of the internet, and I'm sure I'll get my use out of Skype next year. But, with all the available technology, you can't replace time spent in the presence of your family and friends. Simply enjoying the company of those you are around.... With all this said, I'm fairly certain that I've also been under a lot of spiritual attack lately. As soon as I go to bed I'm plagued with doubts as to whether or not I'm doing the right thing, or if I'm in any way capable of doing it. I think of the reasons why I shouldn't be going. and all the things I'm not good at and really can't do. To be totally honest, a lot of times the thought, "What the hell am I doing?!" runs through my head.
I truly believe all of this is spiritual warfare. Just this morning as I was walking out the door to go to church, my last Sunday in Manhattan before I leave, the thought "Why am I doing this?" ran through my head. I did my best to push it aside and then headed off to church. As I walked into the sanctuary I said hello to one of the lady's I know, she smiled back and kept walking. Then she stopped and came back to me. She gave me a hug and told me she wanted to say goodbye before I left. Next she said something else, something that cut right to my heart. She said, "You know Paul, right from when I very first met you I knew God had this call on your life. It's a hard call, but thank you. Amen" It's like God was speaking directly to me, it took me a few minutes to think about it and realize how blatantly God was confirming this in my life! I sat down next to some of my friends, and then one of the high-school boys come up to me and gave me a bag of chocolate covered peanuts. He said, "I just want you to know that we are praying for you and what you're doing is awesome. Merry Christmas." Again, a direct confirmation that I'm doing what God has for me. The interesting thing is that I'm not close friends with either of the people who talked to me today, which I think confirms it even more that it was God talking right to me. It was so encouraging! It lifted my spirit.
Next year will be hard, there's no doubt about that, but I also know it will be an incredible adventure. Every time I've stepped out on a limb when I felt God calling me to do something it's been very hard and very rewarding. South Africa was an adventure to say the least, and I'm guessing Europe will be as well. God doesn't change, so the way He treats His children won't change either. I've seen Him faithful through and through, so I know He will continue to be there for me!.. I'm sad to be leaving my family and friends behind, but I know that I have a new family and new friends waiting for me in Wales. Every time I've moved someplace new God's provided that for me, and I still have meaningful relationships with people from those places.
Today I was encouraged. Today God spoke right to my heart and gave me the confirmation I needed.
The next couple of days will be bittersweet. I'm excited to be moving on, but I will miss everyone here in Manhattan so much!
It's a new chapter in the journey, and I can't wait to see what happens!
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Looking Back
A year ago today I was stepping off a plane in Kansas City after a 10 month adventure in South Africa! It's hard to believe it's been a whole year!... I felt like sharing what God was telling me on that day a year ago, and what he's showing me today... So here's a little look into my walk with Christ. Below are my journal entries for November 12, 2010 and November 12, 2011.
God bless!
"November 12, 2010
This is it everyone. Today is my last day in South Africa! It feels like I’m having an outer-body experience. It’s very much that bizarre, almost sickening feeling, like you don’t know what’s quite real and if this is really your life. It’s been an adventure to say the least. I feel like the adventure of over now, but it really isn’t. The chapter of “South Africa” is now over in my story, but I know that the adventure will continue in other parts of the world, even Kansas...
I didn’t meet my wife here, but I think that’s a good thing. I know where my priorities are and where I get my value- it’s all from Jesus. It wasn’t there before and I cared way too much about what people thought of me. I still do some of course, but not as much. I’m slightly concerned that I may not care enough about people anymore, and I've maybe lost seeing the value in relationships, so I’m going to try to be aware of that.
I’m excited for what’s next. It will be a good time to reconnect with my family and maybe help out with church somehow for a few months, and then I’m off to Wales for a year, if it’s God’s will. I’m going to miss it here though. The people, the land, the weather, the food, the kids, pretty much all of it- except for the Nomad rules. It’s been great overall, I had a few low points, but you can’t rate happy without sad on the chart. I know I’ve changed and I know that God has worked through me to change many lives.
God, You are so awesome. Thank You so much for these past 10 months. Thank You for using me and for the friends I’ve made here. Most of all thank You for You and for our friendship growing closer in South Africa!"
"November 12, 2011
Today is a special day for me, it’s the one year anniversary of my return from Africa!... Wow, it’s been a year… Honestly, I didn’t think I would be in Kansas right now a year ago, I thought I’d already be in Wales
Looking back at this year, I don’t know if I’ve really given all that I could have. Lived with abandon to Christ like I should. Grown closer to Him like I should… But at the same time I’ve learned a lot. I’ve been blown away by God’s provision once again, raising my budget for Wales in 9 months, and it wasn’t even an intense effort. I remember coming to the realization this summer that God loves me, yeah, for real. I’ve known it, but it became so much clearer to me. I’ve learned to read the bible better, even though I continually need to put more effort into that.
Overall, I think the thing that I’ve learned the most through this year back in Kansas is that I need to trust God and realize that it’s Ok to not be in active ministry for a while. God loves me and I love Him. That’s what really matters. He’s more concerned with me than what I think I can do for Him…. This year hasn’t been quite as “exciting” as last year, but it’s all a part of the grand journey God has for my life. The key to that journey is sharing it, sharing it with Jesus. Part of me really wants to be sharing this journey with my wife (wherever she is), but I have to realize that sharing it with Jesus is so much more important. He is always with me, she won’t be.
God, thank You for these past 2 years and what’s happened. The crazy adventures in Africa: living with zebras and giraffes in my back yard, taking a zip-line across Victoria Falls, climbing Table Mountian, doing silly dramas in front of thousands of kids... My daily adventures back in Kansas: reading with kids, breaking up fights, washing all of my roommates’ dirty dishes, taking online bible classes, playing with my camera… I’m thankful for it all. You changed me so much in Africa, I’m still realizing how I’ve changed to this day. I cherish those memories, but I’m not going to live in the past and how you spoke to me then. This is today, and I am thankful that You are with me and speaking to me now. That You love me and want me. That You’ve chosen me to be a witness for You and to share Your love, it’s such an honor! I’ll never forget Africa, but I’ll never forget this year either. Thank You for the journey, for traveling it with me, and most of all for being my guide!
Right now as I'm looking back over the past 2 years I’m taking the last drink of my last bit of Five Roses Tea from South Africa. 2010 was a great year, 2011 has been great, and I know that 2012 and whatever follows that will be as well. Why? Because God loves me and He’s the one writing the story."
God bless!
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Getting Close
11 weeks!
Getting ready for Wales has been a long process, and it's not over yet! I'm getting down to the fine details of preparing to leave the country again. It's exciting and daunting at the same time, but more on the exciting side!
God's really provided a lot of my budget in the last few weeks. It's gone from 63% to 90% since I last posted!.. Really, I need to be at 110% to cover any unexpected costs that may come up, but I know that God will provide every bit of it!
I'm starting to work on my visa application, which I'm sure will be an adventure in and of itself! Prayer for a quick approval would be appreciated!
I'm looking forward to being on the mission field again! God's really blessed my life this year, but I'm ready to fulfill the call God's laid on my heart! He continually places that calling on my life again and again. Recently I've learned the stories of some of the kids I've been working with. It breaks my heart to know the pain they have to go through and the troubled home-life they have to deal with. I just want to let them know that God loves them and has a plan for their life! I'm limited as to what I can say, but I pray for them. I trust in God that even if I'm not able to speak into their life that they will see Christ's love in me, and that He will place other people in their life that will also share God's love with them.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, and I hope you all understand how much God loves you!
Getting ready for Wales has been a long process, and it's not over yet! I'm getting down to the fine details of preparing to leave the country again. It's exciting and daunting at the same time, but more on the exciting side!
God's really provided a lot of my budget in the last few weeks. It's gone from 63% to 90% since I last posted!.. Really, I need to be at 110% to cover any unexpected costs that may come up, but I know that God will provide every bit of it!
I'm starting to work on my visa application, which I'm sure will be an adventure in and of itself! Prayer for a quick approval would be appreciated!
I'm looking forward to being on the mission field again! God's really blessed my life this year, but I'm ready to fulfill the call God's laid on my heart! He continually places that calling on my life again and again. Recently I've learned the stories of some of the kids I've been working with. It breaks my heart to know the pain they have to go through and the troubled home-life they have to deal with. I just want to let them know that God loves them and has a plan for their life! I'm limited as to what I can say, but I pray for them. I trust in God that even if I'm not able to speak into their life that they will see Christ's love in me, and that He will place other people in their life that will also share God's love with them.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, and I hope you all understand how much God loves you!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Planting Wales Update!
Four months and counting!.. I can’t believe that in just a few short months I’ll be in Wales!
Not too much has happened since I last posted an update... My budget is progressing well though! I’m now at 63%
My goal is to have my budget raised by the end of November. That’s about 10 weeks from now… In order to be at my full budget I need 20 people at $25 a month from now until the end of next year. Very doable!
God has been teaching me to trust in Him the past few weeks… The reality of going to Wales and how quickly it is approaching has set in. At times I wonder if I’ll get the support I need, or if I’m really the right person to do this… But God continues to provide in His timing and always confirms the call to a life of missions in my heart!
I made a short video to express the need for Christ in Cardiff… The simple truth comes down to this: People in Wales need Jesus and I need your help through prayers and finances to be there…. That’s why I send out newsletters and post blogs. I need your help. I can’t do this without you… Please be a part of what God is doing in Wales.
Thank you and God bless!
Friday, August 12, 2011
Please Die
1. Jesus
2. Jesus
3. Jesus
What's your purpose in this life? What are your priorities in life? What are you living or dying for?
The simple and full answer is Jesus! We are made to love Him, to be with Him.
God has been revealing Himself to me in totally awesome ways lately, it's hard to even describe. My times of reading/prayer/worship have been infused with new life and joy!
A few nights ago God really showed me something, I've been seeking after God's "movement" or "revival" more than I've been seeking after Him... It's so easy to have the best of intentions, but at the same time forget the reason for it all. It's about Jesus first, second, and third. Always about Him. How am I to bring the Gospel and love of Christ to people if I'm not in a passionate love relationship with Jesus?.... I'm reminded of a post I wrote in my old blog at the end of last year titled "Love Me First". That's what God showed me right after I got back from Africa, and I'm realizing that He is still, and probably will be for the rest of this life, teaching me this lesson. I can honestly say I am so thankful for this year of being back in Kansas. God's been teaching me how to love Him, and more importantly that He loves me! For much of this year I've just been frustrated that I can't be out there sharing God with people, but I need this time with Him in preparation for what lies ahead. Had I gone back to the mission field not long after my return from Africa I fear that I would have lost perspective.
My purpose is not to be a great missionary, be a good public speaker, or even the best witness with my actions. My purpose is simply to love Jesus. The reason He is calling me to Wales for the next year is not so I can get as many people saved as I can or help the Elliott's, the real reason is He wants to go on an adventure with me and draw me closer to Him. My purpose is Him... Granted, He does have other plans and reasons for sending me to Wales and I will be serving the Elliott's and desperately trying to share God's love with everyone, but it's about Him first!
In order for Jesus to be first, something must happen. I must die. I must die to my wants, my pride, and my selfish ambitions. I must die and lose my life so I can truly live! "Jesus replied, 'Now the time has come for the Son of Man to enter into his glory. I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat is planted in the soil and dies, it remains alone. But its death will produce many new kernels—a plentiful harvest of new lives. Those who love their life in this world will lose it. Those who care nothing for their life in this world will keep it for eternity. Anyone who wants to be my disciple must follow me, because my servants must be where I am. And the Father will honor anyone who serves me.'"
We spoke about this verse last night at Chi Alpha. The fact is that something is always dying. It's either your relationship with God and others, or it's your own petty "life"... I know that my so called "life" is nothing without God. I don't want it. I want God. I want to die for Him. I want to die to my flesh and even this physical life if it's in God's plan. Death is nothing to be feared. For when we die we live!
I pray that you will soon die to your "life" and begin to experience the LIFE God has planned for you. May we not fear dying to self and living for God. For He knows so much better and He has great plans for us. "Great plans I have for you!" That's what He is saying to us, but we must die before we can live.
God, may we all please die so we can LIVE with you!
2. Jesus
3. Jesus
What's your purpose in this life? What are your priorities in life? What are you living or dying for?
The simple and full answer is Jesus! We are made to love Him, to be with Him.
God has been revealing Himself to me in totally awesome ways lately, it's hard to even describe. My times of reading/prayer/worship have been infused with new life and joy!
A few nights ago God really showed me something, I've been seeking after God's "movement" or "revival" more than I've been seeking after Him... It's so easy to have the best of intentions, but at the same time forget the reason for it all. It's about Jesus first, second, and third. Always about Him. How am I to bring the Gospel and love of Christ to people if I'm not in a passionate love relationship with Jesus?.... I'm reminded of a post I wrote in my old blog at the end of last year titled "Love Me First". That's what God showed me right after I got back from Africa, and I'm realizing that He is still, and probably will be for the rest of this life, teaching me this lesson. I can honestly say I am so thankful for this year of being back in Kansas. God's been teaching me how to love Him, and more importantly that He loves me! For much of this year I've just been frustrated that I can't be out there sharing God with people, but I need this time with Him in preparation for what lies ahead. Had I gone back to the mission field not long after my return from Africa I fear that I would have lost perspective.
My purpose is not to be a great missionary, be a good public speaker, or even the best witness with my actions. My purpose is simply to love Jesus. The reason He is calling me to Wales for the next year is not so I can get as many people saved as I can or help the Elliott's, the real reason is He wants to go on an adventure with me and draw me closer to Him. My purpose is Him... Granted, He does have other plans and reasons for sending me to Wales and I will be serving the Elliott's and desperately trying to share God's love with everyone, but it's about Him first!
In order for Jesus to be first, something must happen. I must die. I must die to my wants, my pride, and my selfish ambitions. I must die and lose my life so I can truly live! "Jesus replied, 'Now the time has come for the Son of Man to enter into his glory. I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat is planted in the soil and dies, it remains alone. But its death will produce many new kernels—a plentiful harvest of new lives. Those who love their life in this world will lose it. Those who care nothing for their life in this world will keep it for eternity. Anyone who wants to be my disciple must follow me, because my servants must be where I am. And the Father will honor anyone who serves me.'"
We spoke about this verse last night at Chi Alpha. The fact is that something is always dying. It's either your relationship with God and others, or it's your own petty "life"... I know that my so called "life" is nothing without God. I don't want it. I want God. I want to die for Him. I want to die to my flesh and even this physical life if it's in God's plan. Death is nothing to be feared. For when we die we live!
I pray that you will soon die to your "life" and begin to experience the LIFE God has planned for you. May we not fear dying to self and living for God. For He knows so much better and He has great plans for us. "Great plans I have for you!" That's what He is saying to us, but we must die before we can live.
God, may we all please die so we can LIVE with you!
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Shout It Out!
God is so incredible! I can't help but want to shout it out from the mountain tops!!! He is love, He is our ever-present strength! He is LIFE! He's everything... My heart is filled with JOY :)
God's been showing up in my life is awesome ways lately. I think since I came to the realization that God loves me regardless, literally regardless of what I do, that I've just come to see and FEEL that love in a whole new way. I can't help but smile and I want to scream it out. God loves us!
So often I'm really not that joyful, but I've been straight up asking God to continue to bring me that joy in my life, and He's been bringing it!... It's funny that after I realized that God doesn't care how much of the bible I read in a day that I've actually been reading more. I started reading it online daily here. I've always read the New International Version, but reading it in the New Living Translation has been great. I enjoy the wording; it's easier for me to follow and it reads more like a story. Also, I've been reading in the morning, which has been very beneficial. I've wanted to do that for a long time now but just never ending up doing it. Starting out my day with Jesus is the only way to go!
I'm seeing God using this year in Kansas to prepare me for what's next. This last Sunday my pastor preached about desert places and how God can speak to us in those times in a whole new way. Being in the desert gets rid of distractions, makes us rely on Him, confirms our calling, it's a place of revelation, and a place of discipline. God really spoke to me through that message. It's something I was aware of, but He just confirmed it and made me realize again why I'm where I'm at.
I think I'm also starting to realize my spiritual gifts... I've felt for a while that one of my gifts may be encouragement. When someone is in need or crisis, spending time talking with them and trying to share God's love and peace with them brings my heart joy. I just love it... The latest book I read for my bible classes was about Acts. It talked some about Paul and Barnabas. Barnabas' name means "Son of encouragement" He wasn't some amazing preacher or evangelist, but he was always there to help and encourage Paul. He was aware of his gifts and limitations. When he wasn't able to do a certain aspect of ministry, he called on Paul... Even though my name is Paul, I'm finding that I'm really more of a Barnabas. I don't consider myself to be some amazing teacher, or a super out-going evangelist, but I love people and I love to encourage. That's a big reason I write these posts. I want to encourage others and share what God has been showing me. This is just one outlet for sharing that... I'm hoping to cultivate this gift more, and intentionally try to encourage those around me as much as I can.
I pray that when you read this God would bring you joy and encouragement. My God fill your life with an abundance of Himself.
Psalm 62:5-8 "Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken. My victory and honor come from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me. O my people, trust in him at all times. Pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge."
God's been showing up in my life is awesome ways lately. I think since I came to the realization that God loves me regardless, literally regardless of what I do, that I've just come to see and FEEL that love in a whole new way. I can't help but smile and I want to scream it out. God loves us!
So often I'm really not that joyful, but I've been straight up asking God to continue to bring me that joy in my life, and He's been bringing it!... It's funny that after I realized that God doesn't care how much of the bible I read in a day that I've actually been reading more. I started reading it online daily here. I've always read the New International Version, but reading it in the New Living Translation has been great. I enjoy the wording; it's easier for me to follow and it reads more like a story. Also, I've been reading in the morning, which has been very beneficial. I've wanted to do that for a long time now but just never ending up doing it. Starting out my day with Jesus is the only way to go!
I'm seeing God using this year in Kansas to prepare me for what's next. This last Sunday my pastor preached about desert places and how God can speak to us in those times in a whole new way. Being in the desert gets rid of distractions, makes us rely on Him, confirms our calling, it's a place of revelation, and a place of discipline. God really spoke to me through that message. It's something I was aware of, but He just confirmed it and made me realize again why I'm where I'm at.
I think I'm also starting to realize my spiritual gifts... I've felt for a while that one of my gifts may be encouragement. When someone is in need or crisis, spending time talking with them and trying to share God's love and peace with them brings my heart joy. I just love it... The latest book I read for my bible classes was about Acts. It talked some about Paul and Barnabas. Barnabas' name means "Son of encouragement" He wasn't some amazing preacher or evangelist, but he was always there to help and encourage Paul. He was aware of his gifts and limitations. When he wasn't able to do a certain aspect of ministry, he called on Paul... Even though my name is Paul, I'm finding that I'm really more of a Barnabas. I don't consider myself to be some amazing teacher, or a super out-going evangelist, but I love people and I love to encourage. That's a big reason I write these posts. I want to encourage others and share what God has been showing me. This is just one outlet for sharing that... I'm hoping to cultivate this gift more, and intentionally try to encourage those around me as much as I can.
I pray that when you read this God would bring you joy and encouragement. My God fill your life with an abundance of Himself.
Psalm 62:5-8 "Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken. My victory and honor come from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me. O my people, trust in him at all times. Pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge."
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